


How To Woo A Girl In 10 Easy Steps

by Smokeycut



Series: The Harperverse [1]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: F/F, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-07
Updated: 2017-01-26
Packaged: 2018-08-07 07:50:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7706527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smokeycut/pseuds/Smokeycut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harper Row narrates her plan to seduce Cassandra Cain in 10 easy steps. 10 horrible steps.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Step 1: Admitting You Have A Problem

Hi there. My name is Harper Row, and this is my fool proof plan to seduce a 16 year old assassin who could probably turn me into paste with a roundhouse kick. Not my smartest decision, but let's face it, not many of my decisions are intelligent ones. Now then, a long time ago, in an apartment far far away...

Cullen had just turned in for the night when I hear a knock on my window. Heh, third night this week Cass has decided to crash at my place. I may actually get more nights with her than Steph does this time. I let her in, and she hands me a bag of groceries. 

"Uh, thanks. Not going to Steph's tonight?" 

She pulls her mask off, furrowing her brow in concentration, and finds the right words. "Already went." 

"Oh, cool. Wanna watch some tv? I can reheat some dinner for ya." Just following the usual routine, unless it's one of the nights she's bleeding. Then we pull out the first aid kit, reheat dinner, and watch tv. Or rather, she watches ballet and I watch her watch ballet.

I really just can't help myself. Ever since that night we went to the opera house, I keep finding myself staring. The way her eyes light up when she watches someone dancing, whether it's ballet or just a guy twirling a sign for Quiznos. Her lips, so fucking soft and pretty. How her nostrils flare and her eyebrows furrow when she gets stuck on a difficult word. My lady loving ass didn't stand a chance. 

Her eyes were lit up like that now, watching Apollo on my tiny ass tv. She had stripped off her armor before curling up on the couch, and now she was just in her pants and bra. Fuck, that's a good look for her. I tear my eyes away from her chest and look at the show before she notices.

I've tried to figure out these ballet shows before, but I doubt I'll ever understand it. A bunch of girls bouncing around on stage while wearing frilly outfits, some dude in a unitard leaping around like Nightwing, and classical music that bores me to tears. She gets it though. She watches it like I read books on electrical engineering. I'm glad that she likes it, she needs something like this after all this shit she's been through. I heard that Batgirl used to be a ballerina, maybe I could ask her to teach Cass sometime? I'll make sure to look into that when I'm less tired.

A little ways into it, I get up and microwave some leftover chili for her. Thank god Cullen knows how to cook, or I'd probably just be eating Arby's 24/7. I really gotta pay him back sometime, take him to a movie or something. Kid deserves a treat.

During intermissions or whatever, I ask her how the night went. Apparently Batman and Batwoman want to put her on some sort of team. Her, Tim, Steph, and Clayface. One of these things is not like the others, one of these things doesn't belong. On the bright side, maybe they'll be able to reel her in a little, get her to stop pushing herself so hard. Girl has too many scars already, she definitely doesn't need any more. I doubt that'll happen though. This is all she's got. No family, no school, no normal life. It's just crimefighting, ballet on tv, and a cramped apartment she never goes to. I wish her dad was alive just so I could taser his family jewels for what he took from her.

She winds up falling asleep not too long after finishing her chili, her head resting on my shoulder. Damn, she's so fucking cute. I pull her in closer and get a blanket over her, and think to myself _God fucking damn it, please not her. Fall for any girl but her, you ass._

My little brother can tell you, I'm not good at following my own advice. Instead, I'm gonna kiss Cassandra Cain. Later. After my genius plan for seducing her. Oh god please don't let her be straight.


	2. Step 2: Flirting

I'm gonna be honest here, I've never succeeded with another girl. They're all either straight or... Well they're always straight. Seriously, every fucking time! What are the odds?! Fine, about 10 to 1, and not in my favor. Whatever. Point is, I'm not actually all that experienced when it comes to this stuff. Because of that...

"Hey angel, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" Ugh, that's awful. Nope.

"Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?" Terrible. I'd deserve to get slapped.

"Your face. I like that shit." Wow. Bravo. A for effort. 

I step away from the mirror and flop down onto my mattress. This is going nowhere, and It's been a week since Cass last stopped by my place. Even if she did show up, I wouldn't be able to flirt for shit. I've gotta figure this out.

After I get back from classes.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I stop by a coffee shop on the way home. The barista is a cutie named Brenda, and I think she goes to the same college as me. Gotta remember to ask sometime. Also gotta remember to bring Cass around here sometime. This coffee is fucking great. I buy a muffin for Cullen while I'm there, and one for Cass, in case she shows up tonight. Time to head home and watch some crappy tv while I study.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

As luck would have it, a shitty Hallmark movie wound up giving me the perfect idea (don't judge). So, I went to the mall and picked up some candles, set up an 8tracks playlist, and waited.

The minute she lands on the fire escape, I turn on the playlist, and the sound of electro swing flows from the speakers. The lights are dim, the candles are lit, and the mood is set. Nice job, Harper, you classy broad. 

She climbs through the window and my heart melts as she takes it all in. I'm speechless, everything I had planned to say went right out the window the minute I saw her. _Say something you idiot._

"Uh, hey, hi, uhm...." Fucking perfect, Harper. You're a master wordsmith. Oh god she's walking towards me. She's getting closer. Her mask is coming off. Fuck shit fuck.

...she's taking the orange juice out of my fridge and pouring herself a drink. Damn it.

"Uh, Cass?"

She looks at me and smiles, waiting for me to continue.

"H-how was the, uh, crimefighting? You kick Mad Hatter's ass?" Smooth.

"No. Penguin." She smiles again, but this time it's not her "please continue" smile, it's her "I beat a man to pulp with my bare hands and I feel wonderful" smile. It's a good smile, warms me heart it does.

"Oh, cool. Cool. Uh, wanna watch a movie? I got that new Ben Affleck one, with the robot nun."

She nods, but before we can do anything, a beeping noise goes off. She pulls a disk with a blinking bat logo out of her utility belt, looks out the window, then back at me. 

"Go play with your team, we can watch the movie another time. Have fun, girl."

And just like that, she's swinging into the night again. But hey, at least it's progress, right?

Fuck. I forgot to give her that muffin.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

So, being the genius that I am, I texted Steph asking her to divert Cass to my place for the next few nights. Let's recap the first three, shall we?

Night numero uno. Cass arrives around 10pm, I give her her muffin, and we watch The Convent From Planet X. You know that move where you pretend to yawn, then rest your arm on their shoulder? It worked. Until she had to run off to stop Two Face from kidnapping a newborn pair of twins. 

Night two. Cass shows up with chinese takeout and decides to practice braiding my hair. I didn't even realize my hair had gotten long enough to braid. After some awful flirting on my end, she turned in for the night. Hey, at least I got her to laugh at some bad pickup lines. That's gotta count for something, right?

Night number three was a bit of a step back, however. I may have tried to show her a pair of taser gloves I was working on, and she maaaaay, just possibly, have been flung across the room after they backfired. Smooth, Harper. Real smooth.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I wake up around noon on Saturday, and someone is playing The Ramones. I'm about 80% sure I didn't put any music on last night, and Cullen is more of a Stone Temple Pilots kind of guy. I throw on a flannel shirt and jeans, stumble out of my room, and bump right into Cass. 

"Shit, sorry! Uh, aren't you usually out patrolling around now?"

She gets all annoyed looking and huffs. "Batwoman said take a day off." 

"Oh. Isn't that a good thing?"

She walks over to the couch and flops down on her back. "Want to... patrol. Want to help people."

"Cass, you help people 24/7. A day off wouldn't kill you. Besides, there's this coffee shop you gotta check out."

She nods her head, then starts heading for the door. I stop her before she gets there though. 

"First things first, we gotta get you in something other than body armor. Come on, I'm sure I've got some clothes you can borrow."

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Have I ever mentioned how good Cass looks in a leather jacket? Because I'm so letting her keep my jacket after today. That barista, Brenda, helped Cass pick out something to drink. Apparently she's a fan of tea. We sat down and got some lunch, then she started to fill me in on Batwoman's special training squad.

"She helps me, um... prack-tiss reading. After, um, training." She smiles a bit afterwards. I'm not sure if it's because she's learning to read or because she managed to get out some words she doesn't know too well. Either way, I'm glad that she's getting help with that stuff. 

"Good to hear. Heh, I may need to ask about joining that team someday. I wanna see how good of a pillow Clayface is."

Cass snorts and giggles, "He's a good pillow. Soft." 

Holy shit she's cute. Stop staring Harper, stop staring and blushing. 

"Hey, so uh, wanna crash at my place again tonight? You can use my bed, I'll take the couch."

"Oh. Mission tonight..."

Damn. So close. "Hey, it's alright. Make sure you have fun. Give Joker a kick in the teeth for me." Fucking hell, Harper. Just ask the girl out. Ask her out! _Ask. Her. Out._

I didn't ask her out.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

I walk through the door to the apartment, and Cullen has a hand on my shoulder immediately.

"Stop pussying out Harper. You're gonna date this girl, and I'm gonna help you."

"What."

Cullen proceeded to inform me that it was time for step number 3. Bring In Reinforcements.


	3. Step 3: Bring In Reinforcements

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short update for chapter 3, and chapter 4 is in the planning stages.

Cullen sits across the kitchen table from me, a pen in his hand and an open notebook in front of him. 

Yours truly sits across the kitchen table from her younger brother, a wine cooler in her hand and a phone in her pocket with about 30 open tabs of gay porn that she really wanted to get back to. Seriously, this asshole couldn't have picked a worse time for this little planning session.

"Do you know if she likes girls?" Cullen questioned, chewing on the pen.

"As far as I can tell, she doesn't give a shit about anything but Batman, fighting, and ballet," I answer, biting my lip and really wanting to get back to my porn.

"Fuck, Harper. Use your gaydar. Bidar. Whateverdar." Cullen leaned back in his chair. "Does she wear combat boots? Is she a vegetarian? Does she have an innate desire to wear flannel?"

"Dude! Don't stereotype!" I snap back. Cullen proceeds to gesture at my flannel shirt and combat boots with his pen. Bastard. "Look, I dunno if Cass likes girls or not. The main problem right now though is my complete inability to flirt."

"Then don't flirt. Just be you, and if she likes you, it'll work out." Cullen starts doodling a bat in the notebook. "Or..."

"Or... what?" C'mon Cullen, give me something. 

"Or you could get both of your asses drunk and then make a move."

"Hmm..." That could work. Get drunk, lose inhibitions, glomp onto Cass, make out...

"Harper no. That was a joke. Don't get her drunk!" Cullen stands up and points at me. 

"I'm not gonna get Cassie drunk. I'm gonna get myself drunk. I don't encourage underaged drinking."

"You're 18!"

"Meh." Who cares. I pull out my phone and send Cass a text. I've gotten pretty good at communicating with her through emojis lately. Then I go back to my bedroom and open the first tab of porn.

\------------------------------------------

It's the following night, and I've got a six pack of beer, a sheet pizza, plus a new horror show queued up on Netflix. Cass comes in through the door for the first time in about 3 months. Let's get this party started...


	4. Step 4: Seduction

Do you ever stop and realize you may be going down a very dangerous path? That if you keep moving along, you're going to get burned, and maybe hurt the people you care about in the process?

I don't. I keep going, and I don't let anything stop me. Sometimes that's good, sometimes it's not. This morning I found out what direction this path is going, and I didn't figure it out until it was too late. It all started last night...

I had invited Cass over to watch a new horror series, vetted beforehand by Cullen to make sure it wouldn't set off any of her triggers. He went over to his boyfriend's place for the night, and I ordered a few pizzas, wings, and got some beer from a guy outside a hardware store. Don't judge.

She came in through the door for the first time in months, wearing civvies instead of her costume, and walked straight into the kitchen. I had almost forgotten she even owned normal clothes, but hot damn did her ass look good in those jeans. The way she was bent over, rifling through my fridge, fucking hell I thought I was gonna faint. I probably looked like a slob in comparison, with my stained hoodie and torn jeans. Maybe she found that sorta thing sexy? 

I tapped her on the shoulder, drawing her attention away from my leftover cheesesteak. "I actually ordered a pizza. It should be here soon, if ya wanna watch tv while we wait."

She nodded her head, smiled wide at the word "pizza", and tossed herself onto my couch. Too fucking cute. I hopped over the back of the couch and landed next to her. Kickass, I know. I turned on Netflix on the tv and pulled up the show, while Cass got comfortable. She propped her feet up on my lap, which uh... Got me to blush. A lot. 

Beyond that, not a whole lot happened for the beginning of the episode. I was getting started on my first beer when the doorbell rang. Money and pizza changed hands, and Cass lurked behind me like some sort of cheese hungry zombie. I set the pizza box down on the stovetop, opened it, and in the blink of an eye watched half of it teleport onto Cassie's plate. We sat back down and kept watching. 

The hours flew by, I drank too much beer, and Cassie ended up shoving about two thirds of the pizza into her mouth. That really shouldn't have turned me on as much as it did, and yet...

Now, that whole "going down a dangerous path" thing I mentioned earlier? Yeah, that was partially caused by my decision to get drunk. Mostly. Entirely. I should _not_ have started drinking last night. It started harmlessly enough. It helped me calm my nerves when it came to flirting. Some choice moments include...

"I bet I could beat you if we wrestled," I said while knowing it'd end with me pinned beneath her.

"Your hair is getting kinda long. Want me to cut it sometime?" I asked just for an excuse to play with it.

"Hey, if this is ever too scary, feel free to ask me to hold you," I offered, hoping she'd actually go along with it. (She did)

"You look really hot in those jeans." There's no excuse for that one. I was shitfaced and she was gorgeous. It slipped out.

And finally, the pièce de résistance. We were between episodes, she was refilling her cup of soda, I was throwing away another can of beer, and I got bold. Last night was the night I was finally gonna show her how I feel, you know? But I hadn't actually done it yet. I couldn't let this chance slip away, and so I made my move.

"Hey, uh, Cass?" 

She turned to look at me, her head tilted slightly, curious. My heart was beating so hard it felt like it'd burst out of my chest at any moment. I took a breath, took her by the hand, leaned in to kiss her...

And blacked out. I can't remember anything else that happened last night, no matter how hard I try. Getting drunk was a mistake. A very, very, _very_ big mistake. Why do I say this? Because now I'm laying in my bed the morning after, hungover as fuck, and asking myself three very important questions.

Why did I have to get drunk?

What did I do last night?

Why am I naked?


	5. Step 5: Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harper wakes up after a night of flirting and drinking with Cassie. Did she get what she wanted?

You know, when I devised my plan to seduce Cassandra, I never consciously decided to drunkenly fuck her and then forget the whole thing. At the very least, I would want to remember that. Or, well, fuck...

Not fuck her. Fuck me. Fuck this. I wanted to _date_ Cassie, not _fuck_ her! I feel awful, and only part of that is the hangover. I took advantage of her. I want to just curl up under these blankets and never come out. It feels like a fucking pit in my heart. Or stomach. I fucked up. I fucked up real bad. But I can't wallow in self pity. I have to get up. I have to talk to Cassie, apologize, and like... See if she just wants to date? I guess? I'll do that. 

In ten more minutes.

"Ten more minutes" is so not long enough to wallow in self pity, but fuck it, fine. I'll get up and do damage control. I push myself out of bed, pull on some pajama pants, a tank top, make sure I don't look too awful (I look like I'm sick to my stomach), and head out of my bedroom. Stumble to the kitchen, and boom. There she is. There's her legs, without any pants. There's her back, without any shirt. There's her face, drinking a glass of orange juice. And there's her chest. It's just right fuckin there. Nipples and aureolas and all that. But I'm not turned on right now. I didn't think it was possible for my heart to drop any more, but it just did. 

Scars. She has so many scars. Long ones stretching across her arms and legs, small round ones all over the place, nasty, jagged ones that just jump out at you... God, Cassie, what did they do to you? I can't even begin to imagine how much pain, how much... Jesus, no. Just no. I can't do this. I cannot do this. I can't _use her_ like this. Like some game, or a prize to catch. I never stopped to focus on what she wanted, I never thought about what she went through, I just fucking took _advantage_ of her. I'm gonna be sick...

"Morning." Her tiny little voice snaps me out of it, pulls me back to reality. She's got this smirk on her face, like she just remembered the world's funniest joke. Does she care? Does she not realize I took advantage of her? 

"Morn. Um, morning. How are you?" 

"Sticky. Need to, um, shower." She makes a face and looks at her hands.

Sticky. _Sticky_. Nope. No. Nopety no no nope. 

"Sure. Uh, go right ahead. We keep shampoo and body wash and stuff in the cabinet in there." 

She nods and scurries off to get herself clean. I sit down on the couch and bury my head in my arms. She stays in the shower for a while, and comes out wearing her costume. I look at her, and I feel my heart beating faster. She still looks beautiful. 

"Cass, is it okay if I ask you something?" Shit, no. Don't ask her, Harper. _Do not ask her that_.

She tilts her head, curious.

"Your scars... Did your dad do that?" Fuck. I hate myself. I'm an idiot and I hate myself.

Her face falls, and she sits down on the armrest of the couch. "Yes. He'd play... Games. Um, the one... Two for flinching, but... With a gun."

"Oh, Cassie..." My eyes are hot and wet and I'm crying and I hate it. I hate her dad for hurting her. I hate myself for chasing her like some game. I hate the universe for putting her through all of this. I wrap my arms around her tight. We stay like that for a while, until she leaves.

She has her mask on when she leaps off the fire escape, which is a pretty clear sign of what she's gonna be doing for the day. Exactly what she does every day. What they trained her to do. She's going off to fight, and get more scars...

I'm done. There are no more steps. There are no more flirty jokes. This is over.


	6. Step 6: Cut Your Losses

As it would turn out, giving up is a lot harder than expected. Since things... _happened_ with Cass, she'd kept on coming over to my place most nights, and still crashed on my couch. As a result, I kept getting reminders of how infuriatingly beautiful she is. She also kept stealing all of our orange juice. So I kept buying more orange juice. I _liked_ buying her orange juice. So uh... not much had really changed since that night, aside from a return to abstinence. But I didn't want to hurt her. I didn't want to use her like I did. So I did something. Something not good. 

It was about a week after I woke up naked, and Cass was sleeping on the couch when I got home from work. I cracked open one of my textbooks and started to study until she woke up. When she did... 

"Uh, hey Cass. I'm sorry about this, but I'm gonna need you to head out soon. I got a lot of studying to do, and Cullen's boyfriend is coming over in a bit. Would you mind going to Steph's?" 

She looked surprised, but nodded her head. She grabbed a grocery bag full of snacks that she must have brought with her, pulled her mask on, and leapt out the window. I watched her swing off into the distance before turning back to my textbook. I had lied. Cullen's boyfriend wasn't coming over. I can study just fine with her there. But I had to push her away. I just can't let her get close, I don't want to use her again. 

And so, that was the game plan for the next two weeks. Picking up shifts at work when she's most likely to come over. Lying about Cullen having his boyfriend over (which only backfired once, when she ended up watching Sailor Moon with them all night). Pretending to be sick. I dunno, I figured if I kept her at arm's length long enough, it'd end any romantic feelings I had for her. I still went with her, Tim and Steph to parties, and helped out around the belfry whenever they needed me. I just... avoided being alone with her. And being drunk around her. Eventually, I guess that turned into just avoiding being around her at all...

So, on one of my days off, Tim and I went out and grabbed some lunch. We were in the food court at the mall, catching up and talking about tech. 

"So you got the taser gloves working right?" He asked, sipping at his soda.

"Yup. They fried Cass once or twice, but I think I've worked out the kinks. Haven't shocked myself with them in a few days, so I think we're in the clear." 

"Speaking of Cass..." he began, frowning.

"Is she okay? Did she get hurt?" To be fair, it's hard not to worry about her when she's running around all night, picking fights with muggers.

"No. but she's been pretty down lately. Says you're avoiding her." Oh fuck you, Tim. Why did you have to make me feel guilty? Can't we just let me be a bitch?

I laid my head on the table and groaned. "I don't know what to do, Tim."

"Uh... what do you mean? She's your friend. Whatever it is that's gotten between you, I'm sure you can sort it out."

I looked him in the eye. "I'm in love with her."

"Oh."

"I fucked her."

" _Oh_."

"I saw her scars, Tim. What her dad did to her. I chased after her like it was some stupid game, and I _used her_. That's why I'm keeping my distance. I don't wanna hurt her."

"But you _are_ hurting her. Harper, you're one of the only friends she's ever had, you can't cut her out like this. I know you, and I know how smart you are. I'm sure you can figure this out, whether you date her or not." 

"You know, you're really annoying when you're right." It's true. He is.

"It's a blessing and a curse." He leaned forward, and pointed a finger at me. "I'm serious though, Harper. Don't shut Cassie out. You matter a lot to her, and I know she matters to you too."

"Alright, alright. I'll figure something out." I sighed, then glanced at him and smiled. "Thanks, Tim."

He was about to respond when his phone went off. Steph was calling him. The conversation was short, but I'm not gonna forget what I heard anytime soon.

"Hey, what's up? Steph? Steph, slow down. What happened? _Shit_. Is she okay? Yeah, I'm with Harper right now. We'll be right there." He looked at me, his face blanched. "Cass is hurt. Steph is with her at Leslie Thompkin's clinic, but it doesn't look too good. We gotta go."

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.


	7. Step 7: Get It Out In The Open

When I get to Dr. Thompkins' clinic with Tim, we run straight to Cassie's bed. Her costume is off, replaced by a spare pair of civilian clothes. I don't know if Steph brought them, or if Dr. Thompkins keeps them around in case of secret identity emergencies, but to be honest I don't really care. Not right now. Not while she's laying in bed, unconscious and with a pair of cracked ribs, several stab wounds, and bullets in her chest and shoulders. Leslie briefed us when we got here, said that a friend of Batman's, another doctor, had treated Cass, but she would need rest. A lot of rest. So I turn to Steph for more answers, like how the hell this happened.

"There was a bank robbery, and Cass and I were there, trying to take them down. But one of them, this big guy, he must have been a metahuman. Cass went to take him down, but he just looked at her, and she went flying into the wall. His buddies, they just, they went after her with everything they had, and she couldn't even fight back because he kept her down." Steph looks back at Cass and clenches her cape in her fist. Before I can respond, a woman wearing a lab coat walks up to us. She's got a streak of white hair cutting through the black, and looks like she's about to give an evil monologue. 

"Harper Row, I presume? Don't worry about Cassandra one bit, she's going to be just fine. You'd be quite surprised at how quickly someone can heal after being pumped full of serums I developed in Monster Town. She won't turn into a gigantic black bat on you, so don't fret. She should actually be ready to talk to you soon. But be careful, she may fall asleep mid sentence and not wake up for, oh... twenty eight hours? Give or take. Ta ta!" She pushes her way past us and walks out of the building, whistling the X-Files theme. Okay. That's a thing that just happened. 

"Harper?" Cass whispers weakly. I sit in the chair at her bedside immediately, and grab her hand, but she frowns and pulls it away, and my heart sinks. "Why are you.. here?" She asks tensely.

Steph puts her hand on my shoulder and speaks softly. "Tim and I are gonna go wait outside, give you two some room to talk." She walks out, dragging Tim with her, and leaving us alone in the room.

"I heard you were hurt, of course I came. Why wouldn't I?" What's gotten into her? Why does she seem mad?

"You didn't.. want me _around_ anymore!" She seethes. "You pushed me _away_. So... why come now? Am I... good enough for you, now that.. I'm hurt?"

"Cassie, I... I'm sorry. I can explain later. I just wanted to make sure you were okay..." I struggle to get the words out. It's like they're caught in my throat, and I want nothing more than to just turn tail and run. But I can't. 

"No. Tell me why. _Now_." She looks exhausted, but she's pushing herself upright anyways. She doesn't just want an answer, she needs one. So I dig my nails into my palms and force one out.

"Because I didn't want to use you." I look her in the eye and continue. "I wanted you, Cass. I wanted to be with you, to do things with you. But I realized I was just using you, like everyone else has. So I cut it off. So I wouldn't hurt you anymore."

"You didn't want to use me. So you... threw me away?" There's no more aggression in her voice, just dismay. 

"No, I... I didn't mean like that. I wanted to stop before you realized I had feelings for you. I thought if I cut off contact for a while, the feelings would go away, and I could be around you without acting like some kind of predator..." 

She grabs my wrist and looks me dead in the eye. "I liked it. I liked feeling... wanted. Loved. Not used. Not.. prey. I read you. Saw your love. Every touch, every smile. Every hug. That was _love_." She drops my wrist, and turns away from me, resting her head on the pillows. "But you threw me away."

I don't say anything. There's nothing for me to say. She's right, and I hate myself for it. So I offer one last "I'm sorry" and I walk out the door. Steph and Tim look at me, hopeful. Their faces fall when they see the tears in my eyes. I try to wipe them away, but it only makes them sting more. 

"Harper..." Tim begins, before I cut him off.

"I'm sorry. I-I need to go. I gotta get some air. I need to go." I rush out the door, and am met with a downpour of rain. Perfect. Now I don't have to worry about people seeing me cry. Wish I brought a coat with a hood though. Then again, I'm pretty fucking oblivious to the world outside of my own stupid head, so how could I have noticed it was gonna rain? How could I have noticed she knew how I felt the whole time?

I keep walking, not caring that my clothes are getting soaked. Not caring that my hair is pressed flat against my skin. Not caring at all about anything but her, and what she said. I feel sick to my stomach, feel like my legs are made of sand, and lean against the side of a building to keep myself steady. I press my head against the bricks and let it all out. Every curse word, every sob that was trapped in my throat, every self directed insult I could think of. My tears are getting lost in the rain but they're still there. They're coming until I can't cry anymore. And when they're all washed away by the rain, when I can stand on my own two feet again, when I don't feel like I'm about to hurl... I start walking again. I'm not going home. I'm not sure where I'm going, but hopefully I'll know when I get there. Maybe then I can figure out if any of this can be salvaged. If I can make things right.

The minutes turn into hours, and even when the rain lightens up, I don't go home. It's 10pm when Cullen calls me, worried sick.

"Harper, are you okay? Tim is here, said you were really freaked out when he last saw you. We're worried. Just... promise me you're alright?" 

"Yeah, Cullen, I'm uh.. I'm okay. I'm fine." I swallow the lump in my throat, and try not to sound like I just spent the last 5 hours bawling my eyes out like some stupid kid. But Cullen knows me, I'm sure he can tell.

"Alright. Tim and Steph said they're gonna spend the night here, and wait until you come back. That alright?" He's testing the waters. Seeing if I'm okay with being around other people, or if I want to just be alone in my room when I come back. 

"Yeah, that's fine. That's fine. Did you eat dinner? Sorry I wasn't around to make anything tonight." I run my hand through my hair, pushing it back into shape.

"Yeah, I'm good. Heated up some leftovers. Just... don't stay out too long, okay? I love you, Harper."

"Love you too, Cullen. See you later." And with that, I'm alone again. I'm glad he called though, because now it's a different type of alone. You know how sometimes, when you're so wrapped up in your own self pity, but someone talks to you and makes you think of something else for just a moment? And how after that, it's like you've been disconnected from those thoughts? You can think about it more clearly, more rationally. The skies may be still grey, but the rain is gone, and I have a clearer look at things. Cullen disconnected me, and now I can figure out how to tackle this properly. I stop walking, and I see that I'm right where I'm meant to be. Gotham Cemetery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter got some last minute rewrites. The most obvious being Dr Victoria October's cameo, but it's not the only one. She made a huge impression on me when I read Detective Comics #948, and it's not often you see a character who resembles you as much as she resembles me. 
> 
> And on the bright side, steps 8, 9, and 10 will be much more optimistic than this one. Hope you all enjoy it, now that we're getting into the last stretch!


	8. Step 8: Speak With The Dead

The rain has lessened up a lot. Now it's just the occasional cold drop on the back of my neck, or a ripple in a puddle of water. It's that peaceful kind of spring rain, the kind that feels new and fresh and makes you feel more alive. The slightest breeze blows against my cheeks, and I feel raw and open to the world. Good. I need to be raw right now. 

I walk over to a small grave, just a simple little plaque on the ground with a name etched into it. Miranda Row. It was all we could afford, but I think she would have liked it. Mom never was a big fan of fancy things. She'd probably be angry at us for spending more on her gravestone when we needed the money for food and clothes. I kneel down, letting the wet grass dampen my jeans, and trace my finger along the letters that spell out her name.

"Hey mom," I whisper. "Sorry I didn't bring any flowers. Didn't really expect to stop by today. Or any day really. Dunno how long it's been since I last came; it must have been a few years ago." I look at the clouds and the moon up above me, and my lips twitch into a brief smile when a drop of rain hits just above my eyebrow. "I have no clue if you can hear me or not. I know we were never a religious family, and I haven't exactly found Jesus since you died. But a friend of mine, guy named Jean Paul, he told me that this helps when you're feeling lost. Figured I should give it a shot." I shift my position, leaning back and sitting down. "Plus, if some Egyptian wizard can fly around with a magic hat, maybe talking to a grave isn't all that dumb."

I pull my flannel tighter, somehow thinking that'll make me warmer. The air is cool and wet, causing goosebumps to raise on my skin. "Cullen is doing okay. He was having some issues at school, but we got it sorted out. Bullies and stuff. His grades are good though. I've been keeping on him about doing his work. He's at home right now with some friends of mine." I know I'm avoiding what I really want to talk about, but it's not easy to say. It's never easy to open up, so I don't. Not yet. "Dad is in prison again. Cullen and I haven't seen him in about a year, and I'm trying to get a restraining order against him for when he gets out. I don't want him anywhere near Cullen again. I'm not gonna let the bastard drag him down. I actually got us emancipated a while back. I've been taking care of Cullen ever since. I'm going to college now, got a scholarship and everything..."

I frown, feeling a tug on my heart. I tell myself to take a deep breath, and let it out. "I wish I could say this to you in person, mom. I wish I had gotten the chance to come out to you. That I got to introduce you to the girls and guys I liked. That you could have properly met Cassie..." I pick at the blades of grass, tearing one in half before dropping it back on the dirt. "She's beautiful, mom. Absolutely stunning. She has the most perfect smile I've ever seen. It's like a ray of sunshine, y'know? I... I love her, mom. I think I've loved her for a long time now. Ever since I was with her at the ballet. The way her eyes lit up when she saw them dance, the way she gripped my arm... I couldn't _not_ fall in love with her."

I don't know whether to smile or frown, and I end up doing some weird mix of the two. I run my hand through my hair. I look down at my shoes, covered in mud and rain. "But I screwed it all up. I didn't tell her how I feel, and then I pulled away at the worst possible moment." My voice cracks, and I worry I'm going to cry again. "I hurt her. I hurt her when I was trying to do the opposite. And right now I'm just wondering what you'd say to me if you were still here." I sigh, then trace my finger along her name again. 

"You'd probably tell me to go talk to her. Tell her everything I just told you. Let her know exactly what she means to me. You'd tell me that it's okay to feel this way about her, that it doesn't make me gross or predatory. That it's love, and love is never a thing to be ashamed of." My finger reaches the W at the end of her name, and I pause. "You'd tell me to go out there and fix this, even if it doesn't end with us together. That I need to make things right. That I need to find my resolve again." 

I don't know if that's possible, but at the very least I can try. I can go back to Cass, and tell her what I really feel. Tell her I'm in love with her, that I've always been in love with her. Promise to never leave her again. For once, just open up to her and admit how I actually feel instead of trying to act like I know what I'm doing. Maybe I can make things right. Maybe I can be the woman my mother would be proud of.

"I love you, mom. And I'm gonna visit more, I promise. I've been avoiding it for a long time, but it's helped." I smile softly and wipe some dirt off of the edge of her gravestone. "I miss you."

I stand up, wipe the dirt and grass off of my jeans, and look up at the night sky. The clouds are clearing away, and I can almost see the stars. The bat signal is shining, and I'm hoping that Batman is out there, kicking that metahuman bank robber's ass. I turn towards the cemetery gate, and make my way over, hopping the fence to get out. It's like 10:30 at night, did you really think I was _supposed_ to be in there? 

I open the door to the apartment around 11, and immediately get tackle hugged by Cullen. I don't resist, I just hold him tight and let him know I'm okay. Steph offers me a slice of cold pizza once Cullen finally lets me go, and Tim puts a hand on my shoulder.

"You seem to be doing better. You figure out what you're gonna do to fix things with Cass?" He asks.

"Tim... I have no fucking idea. But I've never let that stop me before." I grin, pizza in hand and potential plans coming together in my head. "I'm going to make this work. And you three are gonna help me."

"Excellent. I'm always a slut for complicated romantic gestures," Steph claims while wrapping one arm around me and one around Tim, and then Cullen joins in for a group hug. I'm going to pull this off. I'm going to show Cass how I really feel, and let her know I'll never run away again. I'm gonna woo the fuck out of her.


	9. Step 9: Go Big Or Go Home

Cullen, Steph, Tim and I spend the next week sorting out the plan. The plan itself is pretty simple, but the execution involves a fair bit of setup and technical know-how. Tim also spends his time helping Cassie get back on her feet. Dr. October and Dr. Thompkins were a big help, and she's getting better really quickly, but she's still not ready to go back out there. Tim has been keeping her at home, making sure she doesn't suit up, or if she does, that she doesn't end up getting involved in any fights until she's fully healed. She's been starting to stay at Wayne Manor most nights, according to him. Upgraded to a fancy new costume too, after how fucked up her old one got in the bank robbery. I haven't seen it yet, but I will soon enough...

Cullen, Steph and I sneak into the Gotham Planetarium around 9:00pm, an hour after it closed. Steph picks the lock on the back entrance, and we make our way to the main stage. Cullen and I have duffel bags with all the equipment we'll need to pull our plan off. I pull the blueprints for the building out of my bag, and tell Cullen and Steph where to go, and what equipment to bring. Steph sets to work on modding the sound systems, and Cullen starts working with me on the projectors. It takes us about an hour to set everything up. It could have gone faster, but Steph kept distracting Cullen with conversations about which Star Wars actor was the hottest. Neither of them said John Boyega, so they're both wrong.

At 10:30 I get a text from Tim, saying he and Cass are on their way. We finish setting up, and take our positions. Cullen waits off to the side with the controls for the light projectors, while Steph grapples up to the ceiling, chilling up on a ledge that wraps around the room. As for me? Well, I step onto the center stage. The way the room is built, there are four seating sections around the room, with aisles between each section. In the center of the room is a platform, with all the light projectors placed around it. I stand in the middle of the room, and Cullen shuts off all the lights in the building. It's dead silent, save for the occasional shuffling of feet or cough. The air is warm, and kind of stale. My heart is beating like a fucking jackhammer, and I can barely see a thing without the lights. The door opens, and I can barely make out a red shape creeping in. Cassie isn't as visible, but I see a hint of yellow making it's way towards one of the aisles. It's her. She's here. She's here. Oh fuck me, she's here.

Cullen and Steph work in perfect sync, and the projectors light up while music filters in through the speakers. Blue and yellow stars dance on the ceiling as a woman with a soft voice vocalizes without any real words, a bunch of strings backing her up. Cassie recoils in surprise for a second, then realizes I'm standing up here. The lights give me a better look at her and her new costume. Long black cape, bat ears on her mask and a hollow yellow bat on her chest. She looks terrifying in the most beautiful way possible as she leaps onto the platform where I'm standing. She marches right up to me, looks me dead in the eye, then spins on her heel and starts to walk away.

"Wait, wait!" I cry. "I'm sorry, I-I needed to talk to you again. That's why Tim brought you here tonight. So just... give me a chance? You can punch me after, or just leave if that's what you want. I just wanna show you something first." 

She huffs, then turns around to look at me again and folds her arms. I don't say anything. I've tried talking before and it just blew up in my face. No, instead I look at her and let my body do the talking. She'll understand it better than anything I could say.

_I'm sorry._

_I didn't mean to hurt you, but I did._

_I'm always happy when I'm around you._

_I feel more at home when you're around._

_I've always wanted to be with you._

_I still do._

_I will never throw you away._

_I want you to be happy._

_With me or without me._

_I love you._

She uncrosses her arms, and holds on hand over her chest, saying nothing. With her other hand, she pulls off her mask so I can see her face. I can see the tears welling up in her eyes. Before I can even react, she grabs my arms and pulls me in for a kiss, giving me her answer.

_I love you too._

She doesn't let go until I'm all out of breath. I feel like I'm in heaven, and I don't have a clue as to what I'm supposed to do now. We look at each other, doing nothing but blush and process what just happened. Steph drops down from her ledge, then tackle hugs Tim, laughing, and drags him off while squealing about how cute we are. Cullen salutes me, then goes off to join them, giving me and Cassie some privacy. We hug for a while, then sit down in a pair of chairs, just looking up at the projected stars and holding hands as we talk. She keeps her new mask in her lap, and I keep glancing at it out of curiosity before she explains.

"Batman... gave me it. Said it was, um, a gift." She hands it to me so I can get a better look. "I like it. A lot." 

I trace my fingers along it's stitched shut mouth, then start investigating the pointy ears that stick straight up. It's like a freaky mix of her old mask and Batman's. "It suits you," I tell her while handing it back. I squeeze her hand and watch her as she gazes up at the stars. "You're beautiful, Cass. Fuck, it feels so great to actually say that! I've been thinking it for the last year."

She giggles, then leans over and rests her head on my shoulder. I smile softly and stroke her hair a bit, making her purr. Fuck, she's adorable. I wish I could just look at her forever, but I still have one more thing left to say...

"Uh, Cass? There's one other thing I wanted to apologize for tonight..."

She tilts her head slightly, curious. 

"The night we watched tv together, and I got drunk. I didn't mean to have sex with you that night. I just, I dunno, I wanted to be confident enough to make a move. I didn't realize you already understood how I felt. I just wanted to say sorry for making your first time so messy and weird, when it should have been more special. I can't even remember how it happ-"

I get cut off by the sound of her snorting and laughing. Why is she laughing? What happened? Oh God, how bad was I?

"You didn't... do _that_ ," she reveals, containing her laughter. "You tried to kiss me, but you, um, puked. Then you fell asleep. I... cleaned you, then got you in bed." 

...

...........

............................

.......................................

.....................................................

what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh, shoutout to Woefell for accidentally calling this back when chapter 4 came out. I spent a good minute or two laughing when I saw that comment, just because I've had this part planned from day 1.
> 
> Now, just one more chapter and we're done...


	10. Step 10: Kiss The Girl

It's been two weeks since the planetarium, and I still can't believe this happened. She loves me. _She_ loves _me_. Everything feels different now, like it's somehow more real. The air feels cleaner, words are clearer, the stars are brighter. It's incredible, and I'm so glad things worked out. She's been staying at my place almost exclusively now, when she isn't out with Batman's team or exploring the city. We've been doing a lot of talking, or well, communicating I guess. I'm starting to understand her body language better, so she doesn't have to talk as much. Last night she told me that Batman was setting her up with a new family. I guess Tim's dad is getting the adoption paperwork together, and she's gonna move in with them later this week. 

And right now? Right now I'm sitting on the roof of my apartment building, listening to the Hamilton soundtrack and working on a pair of taser gloves. I finally figured out what I was doing wrong before, so this time we shouldn't have any issues with them accidentally shocking Cassie. I finish sewing the last few stitches, and put the needle and thread back in my duffle bag of tools just as her grappling hook latches onto the ledge. Perfect timing. She pops into view and lands a few feet away from me, then turns to face me and walks over, sitting down next to me and pulling off her mask. She looks at the gloves in my hands and takes them from me.

"They work? Not going to..." she mimes an explosion with her hands, puffing out her cheeks. 

"Nah, I think I got all the kinks worked out. Here." I reach into my bag and pull out a stuffed Joker doll. I have no clue why Hot Topic sells these, but they make for good target practice. I tie it to a wooden dowel, hanging it from a string, and hold it in the air while she takes off her gloves and replaces them with the new ones. She pushes herself to her feet, gets into a combat ready stance, and punches the doll right in it's smug little face. There's a loud zap, a flash of electricity, and the Joker doll flips up into the air, coming back down with scorch marks all over it. It's so beautiful I just might cry. We spend the next ten minutes just taking turns with the gloves, hitting the Joker doll until it's nothing but exploded stuffing and scorch marks. Once it's too far gone, we just laugh and hug, making sure the gloves are turned off so nobody gets shocked.

"Thank you," she whispers into the crook of my neck.

"No prob, Cass." I squeeze her tighter. "Wanna go inside? I have dinner ready."

"I thought you... couldn't cook?" She eyes me suspiciously.

"I promise, my cooking is no longer poisonous. Cullen can actually stomach it now. I also have chocolate ice cream in the freezer for dessert." 

"Ooh, deal." Hah, do I know my girlfriend or what? She pulls away, picks up her mask and both pairs of gloves, then makes her way inside. I toss the massacred doll back in my bag and bring it in with me. We toss our stuff on the couch, and she goes into my bedroom to change out of her costume. I started keeping spare clothes for her in my closet, and I think only half of them are stolen. I set my phone down on the kitchen counter and hum along to the music. The pot of spaghetti on the stove is all ready, and Cullen is tasting it. 

"Not poisonous?" I ask. 

"It's passable. You won't kill her, at least." He sets the spoon back down and leans against the counter.

I breathe a sigh of relief and hug him. He laughs and tears me off. "Hey uh, I just wanted to say thanks, Cullen. For helping me with Cass. You're the best brother I could have asked for."

"Eh, you're my sister. After all you've done for me? Helping you find a girlfriend is nothing. Though if you wanna pay me back..."

"Cass and I are _not_ watching anime with you and your boyfriend."

"You can't let me have this one thing, can you?"

"Hell no."

We're interrupted by Cass coming out of my bedroom, wearing a sundress with one of my flannel shirts. She walks up to us and leans into me, getting a hug in return. Cullen puts the pasta on all of our plates, I get us some drinks, and we dig in.

Halfway through the meal, Cass shakes my arm and tries talking through a mouthful of pasta. 

"Bafman shai-uhh." She pauses, chews some more, then swallows and tries again. "Batman said I have, um, tonight off. I can stay here." She smiles wide, which gets me to smile too.

"Thats great! I don't have class or work tomorrow, so if you want to, we could go out and have an actual date. You game?"

She nods, another forkful of pasta already in her mouth. We keep eating, occasional conversations pop up, but don't last too long. When we're all full and I'm putting the leftovers in the fridge, I take a look at the apartment. A costume tossed over the back of the couch, tools and wires and torn up Joker pieces in a duffel bag, plates in the sink, historical rapping coming from my phone, and Cass showing Cullen how to do a sleeper hold. This is your life, Harper Row. This is your beautiful, stupid life. And there's the love of your life, choking out your little brother. 

I laugh and grab Cassie's hand. "C'mon Cass. Let's dance. You can choke Cullen later." She just smiles and follows my lead. We laugh and sing along to the music, we intertwine our fingers and twirl around, we trip over each other's feet and collapse on the couch. I kiss her, and it feels like the sun is shining in my head. This? This right here? This is perfect. This makes all the pain and heartbreak worth it. 

My name is Harper Row, and I just kissed Cassandra Cain.


	11. Reflections

So, looking back on this fic, I'm really glad I wrote it. You can definitely see how my writing has changed over these past few months, and I'm proud of how far I've come. 

The direction of the fic has changed a lot though, and it hardly resembles my original plans at this point. Originally, Harper and Cassie's fallout at the clinic was going to be about Cassie's vigilanteism, and Harper worrying about how hard Cassie was pushing herself, combined with Cassie still hating herself for killing Miranda Row. It was originally going to be Cassie who rejected Harper due to self hatred, not the other way around. It also would have ended with Harper becoming Bluebird and helping Cass fight off some villains, before talking to her about their issues. The final chapter was also going to be a distant finale, taking place at their wedding. 

I ended up ditching all of those ideas for a variety of reasons. I realized that the way I was writing it, Harper was more likely to be the one who gets angry at herself. I also realized that while Harper becoming Bluebird again could happen, I don't think it's the right thing for her to do anytime soon. Harper Row is Harper Row, and that's the best place for her for now. 

The finale actually changed a lot, far more than any other chapter has between first concept and final draft. It was going to be their wedding, but I realized that just felt weirdly tacked on and didn't really connect to the rest of the fic. Then it was going to be Harper and Cass, living in a house a few years down the line. That still felt a bit tacked on, so I worked back and thought about what would logically happen after chapter 9. The beginning of a relationship, with Harper's feelings being based a bit on my own when I was a few weeks into my current relationship. Chapter 10 is pretty much just a nice way to relax after the events of the story, for both the characters and the readers.

Now, a few random notes...

-The song Steph plays in Chapter 9 is Tom's Diner by Susanne Vega, or at least that's what I was listening to when I wrote that bit (which is why it matches the brief description that Harper gave)

-After Harper came out as bisexual in Detective Comics, I went back and changed a few sentences and jokes so that any mentions of her sexuality would be more accurate. It was amazing being able to see the first canon LGBT batkid come out, and it gave me a huge boost when writing this fic.

-The How To Woo A Girl Playlist, aka the songs that primarily served as inspiration while writing this include...  
*Teenage Dirtbag by Postmodern Jukebox (ft. Jax)  
*Say No To This from Hamilton  
*Love Will Have It's Sacrifices by Soles  
*Tom's Diner by Suzanne Vega  
*Tomodachi by Utada Hikaru  
*Mannequin by Yuna  
*Sleep Evil, Sleep by Steam Powered Giraffe  
*She by Jen Foster  
*It's Good To Be In Love by Frou Frou

And, uh... that's about it I guess. How To Woo A Girl is officially finished. On the bright side, I have at least three one shots planned that'll serve as followups to this. Keep an eye out for them!

One more thing; good luck everyone. These next four years are going to be hard, but we have each other to count on. I'm going to keep doing what I can to help, and if that means writing stories that tell LGBT people they can have a happy ending? Then you know that's what I'm going to do. It'll be hard, and we'll have to fight like hell, but we'll get happy endings.


End file.
